It has been awhile…  A LONG WHILE. Let me tell you about my life.

My computer died. Yup, died. You turn it on and it’s on, but the screen was black.

BUT I fixed it. It took 3-4 straight days of trying to run everything and back up stuff but I got it restored to the factory settings. So now I am just trying to get all my software re-installed again.

We are 89% settled in… we love the house, albeit trying to fit our furniture in with the owners. Still can’t find a few things- like my other set of king sized sheets. I start my waitressing job Thursday night. We are having my grandmother and parents over tonight for dinner for my grandmother’s birthday.

We went to NC last week… Mr. Wright graduated! I am so proud of him- he worked so hard to get his Master’s… I feel sort of like a slacker. It was good to see friends- I miss them already! We had a long drive back… MW’s car stalled out in the middle of the Cross Bronx Parkway- right after the George Washington Bridge. Yup, we were those people.

We went out for a great brunch yesterday for Mother’s Day (I got to see my sister, yay!) It was done by the people who catered our wedding- they are awesome!

Then we cleaned out the garage. What fun. I even helped carry our king mattress from the garage to the upstairs of our house. Be impressed. We are trying to decide what to do with the owners bed- right now it’s stacked on another queen mattress- looks sort of Princess and the Pea-ish. I am so happy to have our mattress back!

We are obsessed with Breaking Bad so we finished off our weekend with watching numerous episodes (we tried to go to bed earlier, but the sheets weren’t dry and since I can’t find the other sheets. Good excuse to buy a new set, right?)

So once I get even more settled and get the software back on my computer I’ll have some photos and such.

Happy Monday… what did you do over the weekend?

11 Random Facts About Me- most you may know, some you may not.

THE RULES:

1. Post these rules

2. Post 11 random facts about yourself

3. Answer the questions provided by the one who tagged you

4. Create 11 new questions for the people you tag

5. Tag 11 people

Kjirsten tagged me in this- go read her answers! (She is an amazing artist too!)

1. If I had to chose only one drink for the rest of my life (aside from water) I would choose milk. I cannot live without milk- I probably drink a gallon every 3 days. It could be a worse habit, right?

2. I CANNOT stand the idea of working for someone my entire life… which is why I am trying so hard to start my own business. I work well with others and I am a great employee, but I love the idea of freedom to do what I want. I like to wear all the hats!

3. My sister and I were a product of artificial insemination. I hesitated before putting that on here, I use to ignore this simple fact about my life, but now I think it’s such a great thing. People never know what to say when they find out. I think we are luckier this way, because my mom’s first husband was no prize. Brooke and I are both from the same donor- a med-student with light hair and dark eyes from NYC. We’ll never know who our father is or who our brothers and sisters are- but we only need each other. We were also lucky to be adopted when we were older by our now father. It doesn’t make for good medical history since our mother was adopted, but it does make me want to donate so that another woman can have children who might not have been able to. It really is giving the gift of life.

4. I think in a past life I was a mermaid… or a fish. I love being in the water, although Maine ocean and I are not super great friends. Tropical waters, yes! Any sport that starts with the word “water” sign me up!

5. I love clothes, I just wish I fit into them better. I am working on that… it’s the hardest thing to do EVER. It will feel wonderful when I am where I want to be. I have hypothyroidism… and finally after 4 1/2 years of fighting with it we just got my dosage correct in the last 2 weeks. It’s a sucky medical condition.

6. I used to make prank phone calls to my grandmother. She used to know it was my sister and I right away… then I found Jerry Springer soundboards- let’s just say she didn’t like it when Jerry asked her why she didn’t just come out about her lesbian lifestyle and enjoy it.

7. I type with 2 fingers. My husband just looked over at me and said, “Geez you type so fast for only using 2 fingers.”

8. I used to stalk my husband. No joke, right Meagan and Mallory? Then when I least expected it I saw him again- we were both with our grandmother’s… now almost 7 1/2 years later here we are

9. I wanted to be  a Southern Belle. I moved to the wrong state. Now I am glad I am not one. I am proud to be from Maine. I am surprised at how backwards some people still think…

10. I love to cook. I love to bake. I love to read cooking blogs. I could live in the kitchen… it’s where the heart is.

11. I think I have ADD… bad. If you try to get me to watch a movie or show without doing something else during it I fall asleep. Caffeine makes me sleepy. I start to do something and wander off and forget what I was doing. I was told to go and get tested so I could at least find out how to manage myself. Only if I am super interested in something can I really concentrate- it could just be how we live today… wait, what was I talking about?

Questions I was asked by Kjirsten…

1. What is your favorite compliment someone has paid you? People always tell me they look forward to my parties because I make such good food. I love to feed people… I want people to feel welcome and at home… as said, the kitchen is where the heart is.
2.  What hobby / new skill would you like to try next? Hmmm… good question. Usually when I want to try something new I go out and do it, so I am not sure what to say. I guess given my love for photography I would love to learn how to develop my own photographs. It’s a dying art and photography class left school the year before I could take it so I have always wanted to learn. That or take cooking/pastry classes in Europe!
3.  How did you meet your best friend? Well my sister is my best friend… so that’s explanatory. I met Meagan when we were 3 at the nursery school my mom had at our house… I met Eliza in kindergarten, but we became friends in 2nd grade… I met Abel working at Harborside… and for my BFF in NC- I met Becky at a Halloween party, her boyfriend was my co-worker. I can’t just say one person!
4. What would you like to be said about you in your obituary? That I was a loving wife, (mom someday!), sister, daughter, etc. That I loved my family, was creative and successful at whatever ventures I pursued and that I lived and loved life with as much enthusiasm as possible. I was compassionate towards others and had a lot of adventures.
5. What is one of your favorite family traditions? Ack! Just one? Abel and I haven’t developed a lot of our own yet (not that we haven’t tried!)… so I love Christmas. Every Christmas Eve we drive around looking at Christmas lights and listening to Christmas carols. Then when we were little we would open pajamas and then climb into bed and listen for Santa’s sleigh bells. (And every year my dad would miss the bells because he “had” to take a shower.) My parents did this probably up until a few years ago. I really love the magic in Christmas and can’t wait to do that for my own children.
6. Name three things every person should learn how to do: Cook, Sew on a Button, and be themselves
7. It’s been said, “You are what you eat” so, what are you today? This was yesterday (today was too weird with a potluck brunch): Fried Green Tomatoes with cheddar and country ham scrambled eggs with charon sauce, potato casserole, grapes, milk, tiramisu, strawberries, strawberry margaritas, blueberry vodka pomegranate cocktail, grilled chicken, potatoes au gratin, peas, garlic bread with cheese, Woodchuck Belgian Cider, chocolate milk, homemade dark chocolate peanut butter cups, lemon tootsie roll… I ate a lot!
8.  Tell me about a friend you admire: What qualities make them such a gem? I admire my husband and sister a lot (they both have a ton of the same qualities- driven, ambitious, meticulous, sweet and just all around wonderful) but I want to talk about my friend Becky. The first time I met Becky was at a co-worker’s Halloween party. She is the girlfriend of another co-worker and I admit, when he said he was bringing her for some reason I thought I would hate her. But guess what? From the second she opened her mouth I loved her… and not in that “I’m drunk, it’s Halloween- she’s a pirate I love pirates, be my friend” kind of way. She is that girl in the room who makes everyone her friend. Everyone instantly likes her… and if you mention her name people say, “Aw I love Becky.” We didn’t hang out a lot to start out… but then we started to hang out more and more (turns out we live like .5 miles away from each other.) She sang at our wedding. We have dinner together A LOT. She is so smart… and beautiful, and driven and talented and encouraging and sweet… and she is always thinking about me and brings me little presents all the time- if I make you cupcakes and there are sprinkles on them they probably came from Becky. She is all the wonderful traits you could ask for in a friend. You can talk to her and she listens… AND I AM GOING TO MISS HER SO MUCH. Thankfully she has already planned her visit to Maine, because I am already missing her and I just talked to her like 2 hours ago. Gushy enough for ya? You want her as your friend, don’t you? I don’t blame you.
9. Where is your favorite place to go in your town? Well… in NC… I am not sure I have a favorite place- the pool at our apartment? There aren’t a lot places I LOVE to go on a regular basis… In Maine I love to go anywhere near the ocean… I can think and feel alive near the ocean.

10. How many pairs of shoes do you own? Shoes are sort of my thing… 85 or so pairs… (I did do some closet cleaning out recently!) There are probably 10 pairs of flip flops in there though- not so bad!

11. What would you say to your 16 year old self? You aren’t as cool as you think you are. You are not really that grown up… and the best thing you could possibly do for yourself is be true to who you are. Don’t care about what people think- do what interests you and don’t worry about what people think- you could become really awesome at whatever it is you decide you love when you are older (when you don’t care about other people’s opinions.) And that guy you like? So not worth it. Something better will come along… high school “love” hardly ever lasts… and for those it does must have worked really hard to grow together (and they were probably true to who they were to begin with.) But it’s not worth the tears.

NEW QUESTIONS:

1. What will you be doing a year from now- or what do you hope to be doing?

2. If you could do anything for one day (money was no object) what would you do?

3. If you could change 2 thing about yourself what would they be?

4. What’s your go-to meal when short on time?

5. What meal do you cook when you are trying to impress someone?

6. What drives you crazy? (Pet peeve or otherwise.)

7. How much cash is in your wallet? And will you share?

8. If you could be on any TV show or in any movie what would it be?

9. If you could try any career for a day what would you choose?

10. How many children do you want/hope/plan to have (or have you had) and what names do you have picked out or did you name them and why?

11. Who is one person in the media you love to hate? (Or dislike if you will…) Who do you love? Why?

Day 2 at the school wasn’t as bad as day 1 (oh and Day 2 was on Wednesday- I am slow.)

Oh, and I didn’t slap a “witch.”

But the day did start with one photographer tripping over a 30 rack of beer and a carton of cigarettes a teacher left at the door (presumably while she went back to her car to get more?) Really at a preschool?

Oh, wait… forgot it was in the ghetto probably next to a crack den.

BUT I made it out alive and never ever have to go back there again.

WOOHOO!

Today’s day was super easy… thought with it being Friday the 13th (I almost called it Good Friday and then Black Friday) it might be jinxed- the exact opposite.

I held the happiest giggling baby ever. She was so cute. She laughed so much at me she almost choked on her giggles.

Now I am packing… I got 16-18 boxes today at the liquor store. If only they were filled! Off to pack and enjoy a Strawberry Mimosa Popsicle! (Granted there is maybe a half an ounce of Prosecco in the popsicle, but it still feels indulgent!)

Happy Friday everyone… enjoy your weekend!

We are getting my car serviced, picking organic strawberries and you guessed it, PACKING! 15 days and we are in a truck on the way to Maine!

Or as I like to call it ‘My Shitty Day.”

Oh, yeah… and be warned, there may be some profanity. I am not apologizing, just stating.

So let me tell you about it (as if the visual of the title isn’t enough!)

It all actually started yesterday when I thought I would go out of my way on the way home to drop off a package for UPS for work a day early and stop at the liquor store for boxes to help us move. Well, I got to the UPS drop box and realized I didn’t have a shipping label. No big deal. I continued on to the liquor store.

When I got there the lot was empty. The sign in the window said, “Closed for Easter Monday.” Really? Easter Monday? At home we didn’t even have the day off for Good Friday- but Easter is a big holiday for the liquor store apparently. Um what happens to those people who need to drink away the memory of their holiday? Whatever. Anyway, I drove about 15 minutes out of my way for nothing. I went home and took a nap instead.

So fast forward to today. I have been dreading going to this school in Rocky Mount for almost 2 weeks. It is literally in the serial killer and crack den capital of NC. Prostitutes roam the streets while grandmothers take care of their grandchildren. 2 days ago two guys were found shot to death in their car. In neighboring town Farmville, 3 were shot to death in a gas station last week- which reminded everyone of course of the murder of 2 people in a gas station in Rocky Mount last year. Since we have lived here I have heard about 10 women disappearing in RM and 2 women missing (granted, all were known prostitutes, so they are probably in a more dangerous area than I ever care to find myself in!)

Don’t believe me? Check this out.

So I was ready for hell… but not quite ready enough.

Enter Baby Beluga in jeggings. What you don’t know what jeggings are?

So picture those on a woman who weighs probably 400 pounds. Now I am not trying to be mean or snarky or a bitch… but I am not a fan of leggings, let along jeggings. I don’t mind leggings with a tunic or long dress- but as pants- I don’t really care if you weigh 100 pounds. Leggings are NOT pants you wear with a short shirt. You are not in 6th grade anymore. (And she had a short top with a hem that was tight around her waist.)Then on top of the horrendous outfit she was THE ULTIMATE BITCH.

She had something to say about everything we did and how we did things wrong. Then she did stupid things that made our lives crazier and at the end of the day she had the gall to say, “My system made everything so easy for you.” No, IT DIDN’T.

You gave me a headache with all of your yelling at the kids.

We asked you to help us wipe noses and eyes- but how many kids came over with snotty noses and goopy eyes? Ummm probably 60 out of the 70 kids I photographed.

Oh, and thanks for mentioning the herpes warts on some of the kids lips. Thank God for antibacterial stuff. Oh, and thanks for helping me with the 3 kids who definitely had a crack addicted mom because there unfortunately was nothing going on in their heads. It was SO SAD. Had she wanted to help she could have told me what they liked- how to get their attention…etc. I felt so bad for these kids that not only are their parents probably messed up, but they don’t have any teachers that give them any love or support. They just yelled at them all day. One girl freaked out because I touched her wrists and moved her sleeves up- is it because of so many people hauling her around by her arms?

At the end of the day I told me co-worker we needed to go out for a cocktail… even though it was only 11:30.

Then I sent my husband a text. It read…

“I am going to bitch slap that bitch.”

I can’t wait to go back tomorrow. Luckily my co-worker has to go there all week and I don’t. Wish me luck.

Then on my way home I called to find out where my new license plate was… out of stocl. Arg. Then I called the car dealership to get an estimate on getting my 30k car service (I am at 42k)… $399 plus $89.95 for an alignment. I hate cars. Hopefully work will cover it since I have put on at least 10,000 miles since working for them in October. Then I called about renting an 85mm lens for a photo shoot tomorrow- they need a $500 deposit- no can do. Work still owes me over $300 for expenses over the last 3 weeks. Lovely.

Then on top of that I decided to try to get boxes again. I debated over which liquor store to go to and decided to go to the one closer to home with lots of stoplights since there was a UPS store beside it.

When I went into the store I saw a little old man with liver spots behind the cash register. I LOVE  little old men. So I said, “Hi there sir, you don’t happen to have any boxes I could use to help me move do you?”

His response?

“I don’t reckon.”

What? Do I have Yankee written on me? Either he knows if he does or doesn’t. Then he says, “I only have 2 so no, I don’t have any. Try somewhere else.”

Okay, guess I have to drive 15 minutes or so off course to the other store I was going to check out to begin with. I wanted to scream at someone or cry at this point. At the next liquor store the guy was much nicer, but said he only had 6 boxes- 4 big ones I could use. Yay. I only wished the Kettle One box was filled with Kettle One, because I have tons of grapefruit juice to add to that shit.

Then I came home and watched 2 Broke Girls and it made me happy… and venting to ya’ll did too. So now I guess it’s time to pack these boxes… and pray for me that I don’t hit a bitch tomorrow.

Would kids really want those? Does this crazy commercial really appeal to them? And really, would a dad actually behave like that with a lucky unicorn or whatever the hell that thing is? The commercial scares me… are my kids really going to be like that, act like that and want something like that? Maybe I am the only one who hates how commercials interact with kids these days and how they portray them?